Screw it. We're going to Key West.

We have friends getting married in late May, and they've chosen a destination wedding in Key West. At first I was disappointed--I really like these friends even if distance and time are making them more of "acquaintances." Going to Key West is simply impossible. Airfare, hotels, the things you HAVE to do in a tropical location like snorkeling, bar hopping, jet-skiing and bar hopping would be frustratingly out of reach--you know, like a coherent argument from an otherwise intelligent-sounding Obama disciple. (You like that? It's political humor.)

But you know what? Eff it. We've saved a little money and business is picking up. I could probably make enough to cover the vacation in may alone. As the weather gets better, people get "movey." So, we're gonna book the trip. Three days in paradise, or a close approximation of it. My wife simply won't stand another Pacific Northwest vacation where 90 degrees with no humidity feels like 50 degrees to her. I haven't had a real, sit-on-your-ass vacation in...I can't even remember. Seriously. The only trips I've taken in recent years have been to my folks' place in Washington State. I love them, but sitting by their pool while the hay baler makes sweep after sweep just wreaks havoc on my allergies.

So, Key West here we come. Be advised, I'm only bringing a Speedo and some suntan lotion. In return I promise to shave my back.